Apple products are NOT designed for idiots. Said the idiot. Good grief making these posts can be challenging. We will switch to using one device instead of three. Hopefully that helps.

Chinatown in Singapore: Wax monks are creepy. The ones that are made for those guys that are already dead were not as unsettling as the guys that are still alive. Just imagine, seeing how others see you. Dirty feet, gross fingernails, crazy eyebrows and all. Did the man with age spots all over his head, sadness in his eyes, desperately in need of a pedicure say “Nailed it! Thanks guys!”?

Listening to the chanting in the Buddha Tooth Relic Temple was, dare I say, enchanting? It may have been the most calming and peaceful sound we have ever heard.

Megan can always be counted on to hop in for the silly photo.

Food courts in Chinatown are done right. Literally hundreds of choices. We kept it pretty safe: chicken with rice and soup dumplings. Many of the other choices required a google search and one of us declaring “nope. I’m not doing that”. We even tried to go with B and above for cleanliness ratings. We might be wimps.

It was hot as hell in late afternoon Singapore, so an A/C pit stop in Common Man Coffee felt necessary. We witnessed a first date that WE thought went really well. She seemed unimpressed. On the other side, the self absorbed, loud business man was just as annoying here as he always is in Seattle. Mansplaining his worth to the smart woman across from him was not cute. He needed to be quiet and listen more.

Sentosa Island, right off Singapore. Wow. It’s like Disneyland….except not at all. We opted not to swim with the dolphins, go on the luge, or ride the zip line but we thoroughly enjoyed the breezy gondola ride.

We found some shade with a view of the harbor on Sentosa Island. It was entertaining watching all of the young Indian men take the exact same photo for their Tinder profile. It was like watching teenage girls at home posing for selfies. Made us wonder what Tinder looked like in Sentosa. We didn’t download it to check. I swear. We didn’t.

Slippery tile makes for sketchy walks. All of Singapore is covered in ceramic tile walkways. There is no amount of traction that can keep you safe on a rainy day.

The Taoist temple was not as large or opulent as the Buddhist temple down the street. The difference between the temples and the modern buildings of the city is pretty striking.

Having coins is very helpful when you need to use a restroom in a food market. Toilet paper was worth every Singaporean Cent.

You will feel stupid when you try twice to get the machine to take your cash only to call the lady over to help you and she does it first try. Awkward. I have purchased groceries before. This time I was stumped.

3:30 is still very early to be awake for a flight but we did it to ourselves again. Off we went to Cebu Island in the Philippines! This time Megan woke up on time. To be fair, we shared a bed. Was it that hard?

Cebu greeted us with a mirror on a stick inspection of the underside of our Grab car. Grab is Asia’s version of Uber. Super easy and convenient to use. Our car was safe. We were more concerned with the electrical wires around town.

There were dogs in diapers in the mall. Lots of them. Kinda funny to watch a dog squat down in the mall and the owner look around like “Well crap. Now what do I do?”. Neither one of us enjoys a mall. We do like AC and people watching.

Driver “booped” a dog on our way back to our Airbnb. Megan said the dog looked okay. Just a little startled to be bumped by our car.

It feels great to wash all your clothes until you realize you can barely walk around your AirBnb apartment as you desperately try to dry all of it before you leave again the next morning.

It is helpful to know when the driver is planning to pick you up. “Before noon” does not mean “he is out front” waiting at 9 am. Oops.

The driver was a beast. He made great time getting us to the north end of the island of Cebu. We saw so many things. Small stands selling fruit, tiny restaurants, dogs napping on the roadside, motorbikes weaving between cars (barely missing dogs), tiny lottery stands with a single person sitting inside a box smaller than a honey bucket, an occasional goat tied to a tree, and a casket in the back of a minivan with a guy sitting in the window next to it with an arm draped over the casket.

It was about half way through the four hour drive that we realized the other passenger was the owner of the dive company we were going to. Let’s refresh. We made him wait for us back at the Airbnb. Again, oops. He didn’t have to wait for long. We hope. Sorry Rolf.

We got our first ride on a boat for this trip! We were loaded onto an outrigger Bangka boat for our 40 minute trek to Malapascua Island. Zero cars on the 5 square kilometer island.

There was even a chicken on the boat with us so we felt right at home. Not sure what the plan was for the little lady. She was pretty scrawny but she did have some fine sea legs on her.

So. Scuba Diving. Sounds fun right? Well, it would be. If one of us didn’t have a sinus infection. (Cough, cough, Megan.) Bronchitis from Panama that stuck around and developed into a nasty sinus infection was a crappy souvenir. Antibiotics are helping, but not fast enough.

Malapascua Island is insane. It is so incredibly beautiful that we are having a hard time believing it is real. We are struggling with communication though. Everyone speaks English but we rarely feel like we are getting our information across correctly. More than once we have been looked at with a face that seems to say “what in the actual heck are you talking about?”. That was just when we were trying to order dinner.

We decided to go snorkeling and check out the black tipped sharks. Maybe we will get to scuba dive later in this trip. First we probably need to find a doctor in Bangkok willing to prescribe a new antibiotic. Third time is the charm? Diving with a sinus infection is a big no no. Definitely not worth the risks!

Snorkeling was amazing. Black tipped sharks are adorable. Megan did not touch one. Nor did keep one as a pet. She tried. She failed. Tomorrow is another day. Try harder Megan.

Lightning over the ocean is aces. We love a happy hour drink with an amazing view. I recommend the pineapple daiquiri. Megan preferred mango. Good news happy hour is every night 4-6pm. Two drinks for the price of one. One drink is a whopping $4.

Some people should stay off the microphone at the bar. Leave it to the professional. She is great. Dude, you were bringing her down. This is not Karaoke.

We like the mandatory taking off of our shoes before entering room #2 at Buena Vida Resort and Spa on Malapascua Island in the Philippines. We love the sweet note of encouragement hung on our door every night. We even dig the bread hung in little satchels with the note. But it needs Nana Jam.

Sometimes our difficulty with communicating has worked out okay. We ordered two of the Watermelon drinks with gin and lime. They thought we wanted two ORDERS during Happy Hour. I’m not mad about it.

There are roosters crowing on Malapascua at all hours of the day and night. They don’t seem to care if the sun is up or not. It might be because they are kept away from each other but just barely. We were told that cock fighting is a very popular pastime on the island.

Our hotel breakfast is pretty fantastic. The food is good and the view is ridiculous.

I was able to convince Megan to try another massage. Her last one was in 2016 in Bali and it left her a little traumatized. She did not like the lady rubbing her low back. She was young. Her take away from that one was “I don’t think I like to be touched”. This time her comfort level was altered by the two of us in a room together at the same time. Think couples massage but not at all that. The ladies that did the massages were very nice. We came out relaxed and smelling like lavender.

Megan here. Mom walked out of the massage saying “I think I like massages because they have to be nice to me for an hour. I pay them to say kind words to me.” I’m trying to be a little kinder to her.

A few days of antibiotics and Megan is still not well enough to scuba dive. We will have to come see the thresher sharks another time. We opted to hire a boat to take us all the way around the island for more snorkeling. It. Was. Unreal. Photos can never due it justice. And the battery died on the underwater camera. Hey Will! I ordered new ones, please bring them when you join us in Thailand.